3x13 GHOSTFACERS
Written by: Ben Edlund
Directed by: Philip Sgriccia
Transcript by: IrishTwilight and OhBooth
TEASER
INT. ROOM - NIGHT
HARRY and ED are sitting in front of a fireplace in armchairs in a lavish room, dressed in suits. They have drinks, and are breaking the 'forth wall' talking directly into the camera, while introducing their pilot.
HARRY
Hello, I am Harry Spangler.
ED
And I am Ed Zeddmore. Now, if you've received this tape, you must be some sort of bigwig network executive. Well, today is your lucky day, mister.
HARRY
Because the unsolicited pilot you are about to watch is the bold, new future of reality TV.
HARRY makes quotey fingers around the words reality tv.
ED
Mmmm, we know you've had it hard during the crippling writers' strike.
HARRY
Lazy fat cats.
ED
Who needs writers when you got guys like us?
HARRY dims the lights in the room an d they both lean forward, ED has a skull in his hands, and the light is reflecting on their faces creating 'ominous' shadows.
ED
Our team faced horrible horrors to bring you the footage that will change your world forever. So strap in for the scariest hour in the history of television.
HARRY
In the history of your life.
ED
Strap in for...
HARRY & ED
Ghostfacers.
END TEASER
The Ghostfacer theme plays over the opening montage of credits they have created for the show. They include ED, HARRY, SPRUCE, MAGGIE, CORBETT, SAM, & DEAN as the cast.
THEME SONG
Ghost. Ghostfacers.
We're facing ghosts where the others will not.
Ghost. Ghostfacers.
Stay in the kitchen when the kitchen gets hot.
Ghost. Ghostfacers.
We face the nightmare. We face the dread.
Ghost. Ghostfacers.
We face the faces. We face the dead.
... Into the Supernatural.
We're who you're gonna call.
We've faced them all.
Ghost. Ghost facers.
We face the faces. We face the dead.
Ghost. Ghostfacers.
EXT. STREET - DAY
ED and HARRY get out of the car, and both have metal briefcases with 'Ghostfacers' stickers on them. They do a slow motion walk toward the camera.
ED V.O
You know, it can get kind of hard balancing our daytime careers with our nighttime missions.
SUBTITLE
ED ZEDDMORE
Team Leader
HARRY V.O
Yeah, but Ed and I pretty much call the shots at the Kinko's where we work, so we can usually pretty much get off by 6:00 every night?
SUBTITLE
HARRY SPENGLER
Team Co-Leader, Demolitions Expert
ED
Yeah, 6:00. It used to be just, you know, you and I taking on the cases - Just Harry and me.
HARRY
Two lone wolves.
ED
And two lone wolves need, uh... other wolves.
SUBTITLE
PHASE 1:
The Homework
INT. GARAGE - DAY
ED and HARRY walk into the Ghostfacer HQ which is a garage. There is a big chart set up, and a table and chairs where the other members of the team are sitting.
ED
Morning, 'facers.
HARRY
Good morning, Ghostfacers.
SPRUCE
Its 7:00 p.m., dude.
HARRY
It's morning to a Ghostfacer.
ED
Corbett, what do we got, buddy?
ED walks over to the chart where CORBETT is working.
CORBETT
Oh, I'm just putting up some of the -
ED points to pictures and sheets that are on the edge of the board, indicating that they need to be moved.
ED
Yeah, this has got to go up here. That's got to go here. Got to see the whole field. Markers, eraser - good job.
INT. GARAGE - DAY
SUBTITLE
ALAN J. CORBETT
Intern, Cook
The camera is on CORBETT, as he talks right to it while he brings in a bag of groceries and starts to unpack them at Ghostfacer HQ.
CORBETT
I first saw Ed putting up flyers down at the - the outlet mall in Scogan. So, I-I read one, and I thought to myself, "Huh. Where do ghosts come from?" And now here I am.
INT. GARAGE - DAY
Back to Ghostfacer HQ where HARRY is poking at MAGGIE when he walks behind her, and she turns around and smacks him.
HARRY
Ow! Ed, your sister's abusing staff.
ED
That's adopted sister, thank you very much.
MAGGIE gives ED a look, and then looks up at the camera.
MAGGIE V.O
Ed has been obsessed with the supernatural since we were kids, you know.
INT. GARAGE - DAY
MAGGIE is sitting at a table talking to the camera.
SUBTITLE
MAGGIE ZEDDMORE
Research Team, Adopted
MAGGIE
And then he meets Harry at computer camp and, love at first geek.
SPRUCE turns the camera on himself.
SPRUCE
Spruce here. What up, player?
EXT. GOLF CART - DAY
SPRUCE talks at the camera as he drives a golf cart with a cage around it collecting the golf balls with an attachment on the front, most likely on a putting green/practice field.
SUBTITLE
KENNY SPRUCE
Camera, Licensed Shamanologist, 1/16 Cherokee
SPRUCE
I am 15/16 Jew, but 1/16 Cherokee. My grandfather is a Mohel, my great-grandfather was a tallismaker, and my great-great-grandfather was a degenerate gambler and had a peyote addiction.
INT. GARAGE - DAY
Back to 'Ghostfacers Headquarters'. ED walks up to the board where the pictures and details are taped with a marker in his hand.
ED
Okay, people, let's cut the chatter and get on a mission okay? Morton house
There is an insert of blue tinted flashes of the Morton House, a knock with every switch of angle on the house.
SUBTITLE
GHOSTFACER HQ 7:15PM
Research Briefing
ED
One of our big fish. All right, we all know the legend. Every four years, supposedly, this becomes the most haunted place in America.
Another blue tinted insert of the Morton house, with the same 'knocking' effect as before.
HARRY
The leap year ghost, some call it.
CORBETT makes his way around the table, handing out coffee to everyone.
HARRY
The ghost returns at midnight just as February 29th begins.
MAGGIE
And no one has ever stayed the night, right?
HARRY
Yeah, well, every testimony that we dug up, every eyewitness has cut and run well before midnight.
CORBETT hands HARRY his coffee and stands there next to him, fidgeting a little.
ED
Well, that's all about to change, baby.
HARRY
Absolutely true, Ed. Absolutely true.
ED takes a drink from the cup that CORBETT just handed him.
ED
Mmm. that's good.
CORBETT looks very pleased with himself.
CORBETT
It's French vanilla, cause the other day, you said how much you liked it, so...
ED
Thank you.
CORBETT
You are welcome.
CORBETT smiles and walks away, and HARRY looks a little uncomfortable.
INT. CAR - DAY
HARRY is sitting in the drivers' seat and talking to the camera in the passenger seat.
HARRY
I like Corbett, I do, shows up early, does his job, lot of good hustle out there.
CORBETT comes up to the window and startles HARRY, waves, gives a thumbs up sign and when HARRY gives him a wave back, CORBETT leaves.
HARRY
I think he's got the hots for Ed, and that could spell trouble for the whole team.
INT. GARAGE - DAY
The camera goes back to CORBETT, when he was unpacking the groceries.
CORBETT
Ed's kind of the more rugged, with that really golden ... beautiful sort of beard, ni- uh, and Harry's nice.
INT. GARAGE - DAY
Back to Ghostfacer HQ, where ED is still standing at the board, talking to the team.
ED
29th is this Friday, facers. We want this mission, we got to move on it now, or guess what - He's gone for another four years.
The door behind the board starts to creak and move, and they all start to scatter.
ED
Oh, watch out! Who is that?
MAGGIE
Whoa!
The garage door opens and reveals a man in a car, that has opened the door to their 'HQ'.
ED
Dad! Aww, come on!
MAGGIE
We'll just do it again
HARRY
Just cut the cameras, we don't need that, we don't need this part, we don't-
SUBTITLE
PHASE II:
INFILTRATION
EXT. MORTON HOUSE - NIGHT
The Ghostfacers are approaching the fence outside the Morton house with a night vision camera recording their progress.
ED
Stay low, follow formation.
They arrive at the fencing set up around the Morton house.
ED
Okay, as suspected. A lot of people have tried to break into the Morton house. The local authorities have just gotten fed up
HARRY
Looks like the cops have got this place pretty well fenced off.
The camera pans the fence and focuses on a 'NO TRESSPASSING' sign, then goes to MAGGIE who is holding a camera of her own.
MAGGIE
Wait, didn't you guys get, like, a permit or something?
ED
A permit?
HARRY
That's a good idea for next time.
ED
Yeah.
HARRY
Car! Car. shh, shh! Flashlights off.
MAGGIE
Ah, Corbett! Geez...
HARRY
Hey, hey, hey, shhh.
MAGGIE
Stay totally still.
Ghostfacers hide as the IMPALA drives by slowly, An American Band by Grand Funk railroad is playing on the car stereo. The camera focuses in on SAM in the passenger seat and DEAN driving searching the grounds with a flashlight.
SPRUCE
It's okay. Not cops- just hicks.
ED
Not cops!
HARRY
Not cops yeah!
MAGGIE
Ed!
ED cuts the chain on the fence with large garden cutters.
ED
Okay, alright I got it!
HARRY
Guys, let's go! Let's go! Let's go! Go! Go! Move!
They make their way across the front yard and move into the house, looking around with the camera's following the flashlight beams.
ED
There's the kitchen sink.
HARRY
Copy that
They move into a front living room.
HARRY
All right, everybody. Ghostfacers, let's line up, everybody.
ED
We'll set up camp right here. This is command center one.
HARRY
Were gonna call this the eagle's nest.
Hocus Pocus by Focus plays over the Ghostfacer team setting up the surveillance cameras and equipment in various places around the house. CORBETT radio's ED, who is at the Eagle's Nest making sure the camera feeds go through.
CORBETT
Hallway cam one, up and running.
ED
Looking good, Corbett.
CORBETT
Copy that, Ed.
ED is a little uncomfortable with CORBETT taking that as a personal compliment, and not as a general statement.
ED
Uh...uh, you're welcome. All right, Spruce, how are we doing there, buddy?
SPRUCE
Checking basement camera two, mein fuhrer.
ED
Maggie, I got no visual on you, Maggie.
MAGGIE
This is Maggie. Do you copy?
ED
There you are, hello. Harry, are you alive?
HARRY
Upstairs, Ed. Camera one.
ED
Looking good. I can smell syndication. Alright, fellas. Let's regroup at the eagle's nest.
INT. EAGLE'S NEST - NIGHT
SUBTITLE
MORTON HOUSE 10:40pm
Base Camp
The Ghostfacer Team has regrouped and is outfitting themselves (with camera's, nightvision, EMF readers and flashlights) to go and search the house.
ED
All right, Spengler. Battery check, battery check, check, okay.
SPRUCE
Check, check.
MAGGIE
Corbett-
HARRY
Lookin' good Corbett.
SPRUCE
Yo, Corbett, dude, you're robocop.
CORBETT
R-robocop? You think I- you think I look like robocop?
ED
Everybody, bring it in, bring it in. We've all been here before, standard walk-through. Team one, west. Team two, east. Spin the tires, light the fires, Ghostfacers on three.
HARRY
Let's do it!
They all put their hands together, and when they get to 'facers' they slide their hand down in front of their faces.
ED, HARRY, SPRUCE, CORBETT, MAGGIE
1, 2, 3... Ghostfacers!
SUBTITLE
PHASE III
Face Time!
INT. HALLWAY - NIGHT
SUBTITLE
MORTON HOUSE 10:51PM
1st Floor: Team 1 - Ed & Corbett
CORBETT is filming, and ED is walking ahead of him with the EMF reader and a flashlight.
ED
Hello! I'm speaking to the restless spirits of the Morton house! Hello! My name's Ed.
ED kicks open a door off the hallway they are in and goes in quickly.
CORBETT
Careful.
ED
Watch my back.
CORBETT
Okay, okay.
ED
What's your name? .3, .29.
CORBETT
Is there an entity or entities here with us now? Can you give us a sign of your presence?
ED
You got to breathe, buddy.
CORBETT
I can't breathe.
ED
Corbett you gotta pull it toget-
Something makes a noise in a corner of the hallways startling them, and they turn the camera and flashlight toward it.
ED
Whoa!
CORBETT
What the hell was that?!
ED
Corbett, night vision.
CORBETT
Okay, okay, yeah.
ED
Calm down, buddy. Breathe, all right?
CORBETT
What?
ED
Calm the whirlwinds of your mind.
INT. HALLWAY - NIGHT
SUBTITLE
2nd Floor
Team 2 - Harry, Spruce & Maggie
Team HARRY, SPRUCE, MAGGIE
HARRY
We're doing a basic EMF, EVP, temp-flux sweep, looks like we've got all of our ducks in a row here.
SPRUCE pauses because the camera is going static and then back to normal.
SPRUCE
Whoa
HARRY
What?
SPRUCE
I don't know, camera's fritzing or something.
SPRUCE turns the camera on himself to see if something is wrong with it, it continues to go static sporadically
SPRUCE
It's weird.
The static stops, and SPRUCE turns the camera back to HARRY and MAGGIE.
SPRUCE
It's gone.
HARRY
All right.
HARRY is about to kick in the door and talks to SPRUCE
HARRY
Get this, get this.
SPRUCE
Turn the knob.
HARRY
All right, that's a good idea.
MAGGIE turns the knob and HARRY continues to kick at the door which opens easily.
HARRY
Oh, my god!
HARRY runs down the hallway scared, and away from the open door.
HARRY
Oh, my god! Oh, my god! oh, my god! Oh, my god! oh, my god!
SPRUCE focuses the camera into the room to see what spooked HARRY, and there is a dead rat on the floor inside the door.
SPRUCE
It's just a rat, dude.
INT. CAR - DAY
The camera is focused on HARRY in the drivers' seat again as he talks into the camera.
HARRY
I don't really like rats, they're gross. Rats are like the rats of the world.
INT. 2nd FLOOR - NIGHT
HARRY is making his way back to MAGGIE and SPRUCE.
HARRY
What- was that an apparition? Was that a spectral- was that a .4? What do we got, 'cause the EMP was just off the -
SPRUCE throws the dead rat at HARRY, and he jumps away from the rat.
HARRY
Oh, god! Oh, that is so not funny, Spruce!
INT. 1st FLOOR - NIGHT
CORBETT and ED are running down a hall, breathing heavily, and they stop to catch their breath.
CORBETT
Oh, god okay, it was just...I think it was just this branch...okay, in the window. This is spooky, man.
ED
This place...
CORBETT
Okay. Oh, no!
CORBETT turns the camera and there are two figures at the end of the hall.
DEAN
Freeze! Police officers! Don't move!
DEAN and SAM come into the room with their flashlights in the faces of ED and CORBETT and they start to freak out.
DEAN
All right, all right, all right. Take it easy, take it easy.
SAM
Let's see some identification. Come on, let's see some I.D.
ED
We are unarmed.
CORBETT
What- are we under- under arrest?
ED
Oh god, oh god.
DEAN
Want to explain that weirdo outfit, Mr. uh...Corbett?
ED
Whoa, I know you.
DEAN
Yeah, sure you do, give me some identification, come on.
ED
Yeah, whoa- whoa- whoa, hold on a second, I know the both of you guys, yeah.
CORBETT
What?
ED
Yeah, huh.
SAM
Holy sh-
When SAM says 'shit' a skull appears in front of his mouth, bleeping out the word, censoring the cuss words. It does this with each cuss word that the guys say.
DEAN
What?
SAM
Uh, west Texas- the- the- the tulpa we had to take out, those two goofballs that almost got us killed the...hellhounds or something?
DEAN
F- me.
ED
Yeah, we're not hellhounds anymore, okay? It didn't test that well.
CORBETT
Ed, what's going on?
ED
They're not cops, buddy- no, not at all.
DEAN
Ed, Ed, you had a partner, too, didn't you-
DEAN
A different guy?
ED
Oh, yeah, yeah.
DEAN
Is he around here somewhere?
ED
He's running around, chasing ghosts. Doin' what we do.
DEAN
Okay, well, listen, you and Rambo need to get your girlfriends and get out of here.
ED with more confidence walks over to DEAN to talk to him.
ED
All right, listen here, chisel chest, okay? We were here first, we've already set up base camp, we beat you.
DEAN turns to SAM and says calmly
DEAN
They were here first.
DEAN chuckles to himself and SAM rolls his eyes. DEAN suddenly turns and grabs ED and shoves him up against the wall.
ED
Oh, god.
DEAN
Ed
ED
Yeah?
DEAN
Where's your partner?
INT. BEDROOM - NIGHT
SUBTITLE
2nd Floor Bedroom
Team 2 - Harry Spruce, Maggie
HARRY, MAGGIE and SPRUCE walk into the bedroom, with the EMF buzzing loudly.
HARRY
10.6. 10.7, guys, the EMF is really spiking here.
MAGGIE
Temperature's down, like, 11 degrees.
HARRY
All right, all right, keep your eyes peeled. This could be it, Maggie, can I get a reading in here, please?
HARRY moves to a door leading to a room off the one they are in.
SPRUCE
Something keeps messing with the chip, I don't know what's going on here.
SPRUCE lifts the camera up from pointing toward the ground, and there is a ghost there, with a suit and hat on.
SPRUCE
Guys, guys, guys.
MAGGIE and HARRY come back into the room and both gasp at the sight of the ghost.
GHOST
Look, buddy, I'm sorry, that's it. I'm telling you, that's all the money I -
GHOST is shot by unknown source and disappears while HARRY and MAGGIE are frozen in shock watching.
EAGLE'S NEST - NIGHT
ED, CORBETT, DEAN and SAM walk back into the Eagle's Nest.
DEAN
What are you doing at the Morton House, Ed? Huh? On leap year- what are you thinking?
ED
We're here to spend the night, okay? It's for our TV show.
SAM
What? Great, perfect.
CORBETT
Yeah, nobody's ever spent the night before.
DEAN
Uh, actually, yeah, they have.
ED
Uh, we've never heard of them.
DEAN
Yeah, you know why? 'Cause the ones that have haven't lived to talk about it!
ED
Oh, come on, I don't believe you.
SAM slams his duffel bag onto the table and pulls out papers.
SAM
Look, missing-persons reports going back almost a half century. John Graham, stayed on a dare- gone. Julie Wilkerson- gone. There are tons more. All of them came to just stay the night through, always on a leap year. The only body they ever found was the last owner, Freeman Daggett.
ED
These look legit.
SAM
They are legit. Look, Ed, we ain't got much time here, buddy. Starting at midnight, your friends are going to die.
HARRY, MAGGIE and SPRUCE run back in frantic.
HARRY
Oh, my god! Oh, my god! Oh, my god! Oh, my god! Oh, my god! Guys, guys! Oh, my god! Oh, my god! We got one! Corbett! Corbett, we saw one! We saw one! It was a full apparition! It was like a class four. It was a spectral illumination!
MAGGIE
It was nuts! It was totally amazing!
HARRY
It...
HARRY notices DEAN and SAM standing there. Once again, when he cusses, the skull covers his mouth, censoring the word.
HARRY
Hey, aren't those the a- from Texas?
ED
Yes.
DEAN
All right, let's have this reunion across the street, guys.
HARRY
Crap. What are you guys doing here?
DEAN
Come on, come on. We'll get you ice cream - our treat. What do you say? Let's go.
ED
Guys, I think we should listen.
HARRY
Yeah, I say no, look at this, look, look. Ed, Ed.
MAGGIE
No, no, look at this, okay, honest-to-god proof, all right?
MAGGIE puts the camera footage up on the screen, and the ghost shows up on the screen.
ED
Are you kidding me?
HARRY
Yeah, no, not kidding.
ED
What kind of reading did we get?
HARRY
Uh, it was a 10.9.
ED
10.9?
HARRY
Yeah, it was 10.9, it was almost 11. I came out, and I was like, "what's going on?" And I was like -
MAGGIE
Hold it, oh my god, watch this part.
ED
Oh! He got blasted.
HARRY
It was crazy.
SAM and DEAN go off to the side, SPRUCE follows, taping their conversation.
SAM
You think we're off on this? I mean, that was just a death echo.
DEAN
Yeah, but what's it doing here? Did anybody get shot here?
SAM
No, not that I could find.
SPRUCE
What's a death echo?
SAM
Look, if we've got a problem here that ghost ain't it.
HARRY keeps talking in the background
HARRY
Yeah, that's real. Like, that happened.
SPRUCE
What's a death echo?
DEAN
Echoes are trapped in a loop, okay? They keep replaying how they died over and over and over again, usually in the place where they were ganked. It's about as dangerous as a scary movie.
SAM
So, maybe the echo's not dangerous, but maybe something else is.
DEAN
You're right, all right, we need to get out of here, guys. Come on, let's go, let's go, let's go, pack it up.
MAGGIE
What about all of our equipment?
DEAN
Lots of fun, let's go.
HARRY
We got more material. We got all kinds of stuff. We'll make you guys recurring guest stars.
ED
Wait! Wait! Wait! Where's Corbett?
INT. HALLWAY - NIGHT
CORBETT is upstairs by himself.
CORBETT
I wish to communicate with the restless spirits here.
CORBETT's flashlight goes out.
CORBETT
Uh, lights out? Oh, I think I got night vision here.
CORBETT turns on the night vision on the camera that is facing him.
CORBETT
That's better.
We see a ghost in his night vision over his right shoulder.
FRONT ENTRYWAY - NIGHT
The team is making it's way toward the door, and they are talking over eachother.
CORBETT screams
ED
That was Corbett.
HARRY
Corbett!
MAGGIE, HARRY and ED start to run up the stairs to find CORBETT. SAM tries to stop them, the 'censor skull' covering his last word.
SAM
We'll get him! Go back! Guys! Sh-
SPRUCE
Where are you, dude? Tell us where you are!
HARRY
Corbett!
INT. HOUSE - NIGHT
CORBETT is being dragged along the floor.
CORBETT
Let me go! Guys!
INT. HALLWAY - NIGHT
ED
Corbett, you need to come back, Corbett. No!!
INT. HOUSE - NIGHT
CORBETT is still being dragged through the house, and he screams.
INT. UPSTAIRS BEDROOM - NIGHT
DEAN comes in and is trying to get the attention of the Ghostfacer team that is scared and trying to find CORBETT talking over each other yelling for CORBETT.
DEAN
Hey! Hey! Hey! Come on, come on!
SUBTITLE
MORTON HOUSE 11:59PM
SUBTITLE
MORTON HOUSE 12:00AM
SAM runs into the room.
SAM
Hey, Corbett's...he's not here. Let's go, let's go, let's go back.
HARRY
No, that was Corbett. Didn't you hear that?
SAM
Go, go, go, come on. Guys, guys, guys.
DEAN
Here we go, here we go. Keep it moving, keep it moving.
DEAN and SAM are pushing the rest of the Ghostfacer team toward the stairs and down the hallway. SPRUCE is staying behind them trying to film, SAM sees this and points it out to DEAN.
SAM
Hey, hey, hey, watch him, watch him.
DEAN
Go, go, move, move. Turn it off!
DEAN puts his hand over the camera, and it goes off and we get temporary white noise.
INT. EAGLE'S NEST - NIGHT
ED is standing by the surveillance table.
ED
Oh, god, what's happened? Oh, god, he's gone, he just disappeared.
HARRY
Okay, let's just go through all the angles. Let's go through all the cameras we have.
SAM and DEAN are in the front entryway talking, and the camera focuses on them.
SAM
Well, it's 12:04, Dean. You good? You happy?
DEAN
Yeah, I am happy.
SAM
Let's go hunt the Morton house, you said, it's our Grand Canyon.
DEAN
Sam, I don't want to hear it.
SAM
You got two months left, Dean. Instead, we're gonna die tonight.
SAM slams a chair against the front door and it smashes, the Ghostfacer's hear the crash and get up from looking over surveillance camera's and go toward DEAN and SAM.
SPRUCE
Whoa! What the hell is going on?
SAM
I'll tell you what's going on. Every door, every window, I'm guessing every exit out of this house, they're all sealed.
MAGGIE
But w-why are they sealed?
DEAN
It's a supernatural lockdown, okay? Whatever took Corbett doesn't want us to leave, and it's no death echo. This is a bad mother, and it wants us scared.
MAGGIE
Or it just wants us.
SPRUCE
Uh, guys, the camera's fritzing again.
The camera drops down and we see that HARRY and MAGGIE are holding hands.
ED
Whoa, whoa, guys, the EMF's starting to spike. This is a big one.
SAM
Everybody, stay close, there's something coming.
SPRUCE turns the camera back into the Eagle's Nest command center and another different ghost appears.
SPRUCE
Oh, whoa!
ED
Whoa!
HARRY
Whoa!
DEAN
Is this the same echo you guys saw earlier?
SPRUCE
No, it's a different guy.
DEAN
Multiple echoes? What the hell's going on?
SAM
Beats me.
DEAN
Okay, all right, all right, all right.
DEAN approaches the echo, and gets in its face.
DEAN
Uh, hey, buddy! Hey, hey, wake up, you're dead! Hello!
HARRY
What's he doing? What's he doing?
SAM
It's rare, but sometimes you can shock an echo out of its loop if you can talk to the part of the ghost that's still human, but usually you have to have some kind of connection to the deceased.
DEAN
Come on! Wake up! Be dead! Hey! Hey!
There is a distant sound of a horn blowing that can be heard.
HARRY
You guys hear that?
ED
What's that sound?
HARRY
You guys hear that?
SAM
What is that?
DEAN
Snap out of it, buddy, huh? Come on, what are you waiting for? You're gonzo! you're dead! Hey!
The death echo gets hit by the nonexistent train, and dragged away and disappears.
SPRUCE
Oh!
SAM
Whoa!
ED
Where the hell did it go?
INT. MORTON HOUSE - NIGHT
They are walking through the house, MAGGIE has a camera on DEAN and SAM who are talking.
DEAN
Dude, there's no records of any of this here. No one got shot here. Obviously, no one got run over by a freaking train.
SAM
Stay close.
MAGGIE
Did the echoes take Corbett?
DEAN
Yes, no, I don't know. We don't know what's doing what here, that's what we're trying to figure out, okay?
SAM
All right, stay close.
SAM looks back at MAGGIE and talks into the camera
SAM
Okay, look, uh, death echoes are ghosts, okay? Now, ghosts, they usually haunt places where they lived or where they died.
DEAN
Except these mooks didn't live or die here.
SAM
Right.
MAGGIE
So, what are they doing here?
DEAN
Hey, give the lady a cigar. All right, seriously, does looking at this nightmare through that camera make you feel better or something? I mean...
MAGGIE
Um...I,
She tries to put the camera down, but brings it back up in front of her
MAGGIE
Uh...Well, yeah. uh, yeah. I think so.
DEAN rolls his eyes at her.
DEAN
Oh.
They walk into a room and start looking through drawers and SAM pulls a framed certificate off the wall and reads from it.
SAM
Freeman Daggett, house's last owner, officially commended for 20 years of fine service at the Gamble General Hospital.
DEAN
He's a doctor?
SAM
Janitor.
DEAN
This looks like his den. When'd you say he died- 64?
SAM
Yeah, heart attack.
MAGGIE
What are these, c-rations?
DEAN
Yeah, army-issued, three squares- like a lifetime supply.
MAGGIE
God, is that all he ate?
DEAN
One-stop shopping.
DEAN turns around continuing to search, and finds a cabinet with a lock on it.
DEAN
Hello, locked.
ED
Oh, come on, guys, this is ridiculous. I mean, how the hell is this supposed to find Corbett, huh? We should be digging up the friggin' floorboards right now.
SAM rummages through some papers on the desk, and pulls one up to read.
SAM
Huh, "survival under atomic attack", an optimist.
DEAN opens the locked cabinet and takes out a box that is in it. When he turns around, ED is holding the EMF reader up to DEAN, who gives him a look of frustration. DEAN puts the box on the desk. Spruce brings the camera up to focus on HARRY, and HARRY points down, indicating that SPRUCE should be taping what DEAN is doing. The camera goes back down, and DEAN is going through the contents of the box, discarding irrelevant things and pauses to read a few things.
DEAN
Crap...crap...taxidermy? Okay, you said Daggett was a hospital janitor?
SAM
Yeah.
DEAN
Ew, got three toe tags here.
DEAN picks up and reads the toe tags, tossing them down after he reads each one.
DEAN
One death by gunshots, train accident, and suicide.
SAM
Ew.
ED
What?
SAM
Well, that explains why all the death echoes are here.
HARRY and ED still look confused.
SAM
They're here because their bodies are here somewhere in the house, right.
DEAN
Daggett brought the remains home from the morgue...to play.
HARRY and ED look at each other confused, and after a couple of seconds they realize what SAM is insinuating.
HARRY and ED
Eeewww.
SPRUCE
That's nasty, dude.
DEAN looks around and notices something.
DEAN
Wait a minute.
INT. MORTON HOUSE - NIGHT
MAGGIE is searching for CORBETT with her camera ahead of her.
MAGGIE
Corbett?
MAGGIE tries to calm her own nerves, but turns the camera and sees her reflection in a mirror, scaring herself.
MAGGIE
Okay, Maggie.
She turns the camera on a stuffed and mounted bird on the wall, then turns around more, and gasps scared, as the camera rests on DEAN who has come to find her.
DEAN
Closer to the herd, okay?
HARRY
Maggie? Maggie?
DEAN
She's fine.
DEAN walks back toward the others with MAGGIE following him.
ED
Harry...Harry! I got an 8.6 and climbing fast. Something huge is coming. Look, something big is coming.
HARRY
It's past 11, you guys.
DEAN
What? Nobody move! Hold on, hold on, stay calm.
There's a distortion and flash on the camera then SAM disappears.
HARRY
Whoa-
DEAN
Sam?
ED
Some kind of surge.
DEAN
Sam?
SPRUCE
Where'd he go?
MAGGIE
Oh, no.
SPRUCE
Oh...no.
DEAN finds SAM's flashlight on the floor and picks it up.
DEAN
Sam!
INT. MORTON HOUSE - NIGHT
DEAN, HARRY, ED, MAGGIE and SPRUCE are walking around searching for SAM and CORBETT.
DEAN
Sammy!
HARRY and SPRUCE
Corbett!
SPRUCE
Talk to us! Corbett!
DEAN
Sammy!
SPRUCE
Corbett!
ED
Corbett!
DEAN
Sam!
INT. MORTON HOUSE - NIGHT
MAGGIE is holding up a camera, and filming, breathing heavily and very scared following HARRY around.
MAGGIE
God, I am so scared, I'm so scared.
HARRY
It's gonna be okay, it's gonna be okay, Maggie.
HARRY and MAGGIE get closer and hold hands, and then start to kiss.
INT. MORTON HOUSE - NIGHT
SPRUCE is on the outside of the place where HARRY and MAGGIE are starting to kiss, and using his camera, he zooms in on them, and starts to hum 'porn' music.
ED
Corbett!
ED hears the noises from them kissing, he turns back to investigate.
SPRUCE
Bow-chica-wow-wow
SPRUCE turns the camera when he hears ED come toward them.
SPRUCE
Wow-wo...whoa.
ED notices HARRY and MAGGIE making out, the flashlight that ED has shining on them breaks them apart, and they are both startled.
ED
My best friend... And my best sister.
HARRY
Ed.
ED
Harry.
HARRY
Ed.
ED
Harry.
HARRY
Ed, listen, Ed.
ED
Are you banging my sister?
MAGGIE scoffs and HARRY points at her, and immediately starts to deny ED's accusation.
HARRY
No! No!
ED turns to SPRUCE and takes off his glasses.
ED
Hold my glasses.
SPRUCE
You got it.
SPRUCE takes the glasses from ED and ED lunges at HARRY while MAGGIE shrieks and jumps to the side.
HARRY
Ed, Ed! Ed! Ed! Ed! Ed!
ED and HARRY are slapping and wrestling, not really doing much damage to one another.
MAGGIE
Ed, Harry! Get off him, you guys!
SPRUCE
You guys...you guys.
They don't even get any real punches in, just have each other held together wrestling for position before DEAN comes in and finds them.
DEAN
Hey, hey hey!
DEAN breaks up the catfight.
DEAN
What the f- are you doing?! Cut it out! We're down by two people.
DEAN shakes his head in disgust and keeps moving looking for SAM.
DEAN
Sam!
ED
Great.
DEAN
Sammy!
HARRY
Sorry.
ED
I'm sorry.
ED walks over to SPRUCE.
ED
Can I have my glasses. Did he knock my - my tooth there?
SPRUCE
Uh, no.
ED
I won that, right?
SPRUCE
Yup, you're good.
HARRY
Thanks, Spruce.
SPRUCE
Yeah, it's my fault.
MAGGIE
That's real great, that's nice, thanks.
INT. MORTON HOUSE - NIGHT
It's My Party by Leslie Gore is playing, and we see an angle on the side of a cake covered in frosting through a night vision camera sitting on a table. As SAM starts talking, the camera angle changes to reveal the night vision camera is in CORBETT's hand, and that he is sitting in a chair at the table.
SAM
Corbett, Corbett, Corbett, hey, Corbett, hey wake up man Corbett, Corbett, hey.
CORBETT wakes up and looks up, the light on the side of his head illuminating SAM who is sitting across from CORBETT, tied to a chair. There is also a dead body, with it's hand on the table sitting to the right of CORBETT that the camera catches.
SAM
Hey, you got to keep listening to my voice, okay? I'm right here, stay awake.
DAGGETT
Don't listen, it stops hurting, so don't worry.
DAGGETT picks up a long thin dagger off the table, and goes to the side of the table that CORBETT is sitting on and goes behind him, grabbing CORBETT's head. CORBETT gets nervous and starts to get really scared and SAM tries to calm him down.
SAM
Corbett, stay with me, stay with me, you got it? I'm right here.
CORBETT gets more and more upset.
SAM
Hey, stay with me.
DAGGETT starts to push the pointy dagger like implement in through the back of CORBETT's neck. SAM turns his attention to what DAGGET is doing.
SAM
Don't, don't, don't! Corbett! No!
DAGGETT kills CORBETT pushing the pointed dagger through to the front of his throat.
SAM
Corbett!
DAGGETT moves away from behind CORBETT and moves toward SAM, CORBETT's lifeless body slumps forward, and his eyes go blank, CORBETT is dead.
INT. MORTON HOUSE - NIGHT
HARRY, ED, MAGGIE, DEAN and SPRUCE are still looking for SAM and CORBETT.
HARRY
Corbett!
ED
Where'd you guys go?
MAGGIE
Where are you guys?
They have come back down to the discarded box they found in the lock box, and DEAN slams it open again.
HARRY
Dean, what are you doing?
DEAN
Okay, so Daggett was a cold war nut, okay? He was - he was an amateur taxidermist. He liked to slow dance with cadavers, and all he ate were c-rations. So what the hell are we looking for?!
MAGGIE
Horrible little life.
DEAN
Yeah, a lonely life...
DEAN gets a hunch, and starts thinking talking it out with himself.
DEAN
A Cold War life, he was scared, he was scared, he was scared.
DEAN turns and walks away out of the room quickly.
HARRY
Scared of what? What?
SPRUCE
What?
HARRY
Where are you going?
HARRY follows DEAN
MAGGIE
Wait; don't leave me in here, you guys.
MAGGIE follows them both out of the room.
HARRY
Wait, Dean!
SPRUCE tries to catch up.
SPRUCE
Whoa.
INT. MORTON HOUSE - NIGHT
SAM is still sitting where DAGGET has taken him, at the table tied down to the chair, and DAGGETT approaches him.
SAM
Get away from me.
SAM struggles against the rope trying to get away from DAGGETT.
DAGGETT
This won't hurt, it's okay, it's okay. Relax, relax.
DAGGETT moves back to reveal he has put a party hat on SAM's head.
INT. MORON HOUSE - NIGHT
DEAN is making his way down some stairs and they are all following.
SPRUCE
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
MAGGIE
Where are you going?
DEAN
Guys like Daggett back then, the ones who were really scared of the Russkies. They built bomb shelters, I'm guessing he's got one, I'll bet you it's in the basement.
DEAN opens the door to the stairs down to the basement, and they go to follow, but the basement door slams shut with DEAN and SPRUCE in the basement and ED, HARRY, and MAGGIE left upstairs.
ED and HARRY
Whoa!
ED
That is not funny.
SPRUCE
Um, who closed the door?
DEAN
It did. It wants to separate us.
ED tries to open the door from outside, DEAN moves back to the door and yells.
DEAN
Ed! Listen to me!
ED
What?
DEAN
There's some salt in my duffle. Make a circle and get inside.
ED and HARRY share puzzled looks, HARRY whispers to ED.
ED
Inside...
HARRY
That's stupid.
ED is still confused and talks to DEAN through the door
ED
Inside your duffle bag?
DEAN
In the salt, you idiot!
ED
Oh, okay, yeah, yeah.
ED and HARRY move away from the door, and MAGGIE follows, filming them. DEAN moves down into the basement looking around with his flashlight.
INT. MORTON HOUSE - NIGHT
ED, HARRY and MAGGIE are back up at the Eagle's nest, ED is dumping the salt into a circle.
ED
Harry, hurry up, get in the circle, get in the circle. Come on, come on, quick, quick.
ED makes his way into the circle he just made, and they are all three now standing huddled together inside the circle, MAGGIE still holding the camera and filming them.
HARRY
Guys, guys, I don't want to die, okay, and I don't want you-
ED
Harry, listen - listen to me, okay? Listen, if we don't die... it's totally okay if you, uh, do my sister.
MAGGIE smacks him from behind the camera.
ED
Ow!
MAGGIE
Nice!
The lights on the table near them start to flicker.
MAGGIE
Hey, guys, oh, it's coming again.
The camera starts to static and goes back to normal, and going back to the static the same as before.
ED
Oh god, okay, get in close, get in close, everybody just get in.
MAGGIE's camera clears, and they hear something, turn around and CORBETT is there, with blood down the front of his chest, stuttering and looking very scared.
ED
Oh, oh, C-CORBETT.
INT. BASEMENT - NIGHT
DEAN and SPRUCE are in the basement, SPRUCE has the camera focused on DEAN who is looking around for any indication of where the bomb shelter may be.
SPRUCE
Hey, can I ask you something?
DEAN
What?
SPRUCE
Earlier, you and Sam...he said you had two months left?
DEAN is busy looking for SAM and not really paying attention to what he's saying.
DEAN
Yeah, it's complicated, a while ago, Sam...
DEAN finally realizes what he's talking about and to whom he is talking to about it. The skulls come back up over his mouth as he cusses throughout the sentence.
DEAN
No, no, no. I'm not gonna whine about my f- problems to some f- reality show. I'm gonna do my f- job.
There is an awkward pause.
SPRUCE
Is it cancer?
DEAN
Shut up.
DEAN goes back to trying to find SAM, and after a second, faint music can be heard.
DEAN
You hear that?
INT. BOMB SHELTER - NIGHT
SAM is still sitting, tied down at the table with DAGGETT moving around him, holding the dagger.
DAGGETT
I've been waiting for some more friends. I get lonely, but you're coming to my party, aren't you?
INT. BASEMENT - NIGHT
SPRUCE and DEAN are both listening now.
SPRUCE
Is that music?
DEAN
Yeah, it's coming from behind this wall.
DEAN moves a big heavy looking metal cabinet to get to the wall.
SPRUCE
Wow, you're strong.
DEAN gives SPRUCE the finger.
INT. BOMB SHELTER - NIGHT
DAGGETT
You'll stay a good, long time.
DEAN bursts into the bomb shelter.
DEAN
Sam!
DEAN shoots DAGGETT with rock salt and he disappears.
SPRUCE enters behind DEAN, and pans the scene in there. We see that there are other corpses, with party hats on their heads and party horns in their mouths that have big scary smiles on their faces in the chairs surrounding the table. There is a birthday cake and plates. SPRUCE the pans more around the table and finds CORBETT's body sitting there.
SPRUCE
Oh, no, Corbett.
MORTON HOUSE - NIGHT
Back at the Ghostfacer Eagle's Nest, ED, HARRY and MAGGIE are still in the salt circle, sitting down now. ED is huddled and rocking back and forth.
ED
Oh, god, what have we done? Oh, Corbett.
HARRY
Ed... Ed-
ED
Yeah?
HARRY
Corbett's a...he's a death echo. He's reliving his own murder.
MAGGIE
Over and over forever.
ED stops rocking and looks up at MAGGIE, they all realize what they just saw.
INT. BASEMENT - NIGHT
SAM, DEAN and SPRUCE are coming back into the basement headed back toward the rest of the team.
SPRUCE
So, what's this Daggett guy's problem anyway?
SAM
Loneliness.
DEAN
He's never heard of a Realdoll?
SAM
No, no, no, Daggett was the Norman Bates, stuff-your-mother kind of lonely. I mean, that's why he lifted these bodies from the morgue, threw himself a birthday party, except they were the only ones who would come. Anyway, so, at midnight, he sealed them in the bomb shelter and went upstairs and O.D.'d on horse tranqs.
DEAN
How do you know this?
SAM
'Cause he told me.
DEAN scoffs at that thought as though it were the only logical answer in the scenario.
DEAN
Oh, yeah. Okay, so now that he's dead, what? Same song, different verse, trying to get people to come to his party?
SAM
Pretty much, yeah, stay forever.
SPRUCE is watching DEAN reload his shotgun.
SPRUCE
Are those real bullets?
DEAN
It's rock salt.
INT. UPSTAIRS - NIGHT
HARRY, ED and MAGGIE are still in the salt circle huddled together. HARRY is mumbling the Ghostfacers theme song, obviously in distress.
MAGGIE
Guys...
The camera starts to go static, indicating something is coming, CORBETT appears again.
ED
Oh, no.
MAGGIE
Corbett
ED
Wait, guys, guys, it's- it's Corbett. He's- he's- he's trapped, he's in a lot of pain, you know? We gotta try and- we gotta try and pull him out of his loop, we have to.
HARRY
Ed.
ED stands up, moves to approach CORBETT
ED
Corbett, Corbett, it's - oh, god.
HARRY
Don't cross the...
ED
I gotta do it, Harry.
ED leaves circle of salt and starts o slowly approach CORBETT
ED
Corbett, listen to me, okay, I'm not gonna hurt you. Listen, listen oh, god, Corbett. Oh, oh, god.
CORBETT starts to flicker during his death echo
ED
Oh god! Whoa.
HARRY
Get back, get back, get back.
ED retreats back into the circle of salt.
ED
Oh, I can't, okay? He's not hearing me, okay? He won't stop dying.
INT. BASEMENT - NIGHT
DEAN is trying to get the basement door open. SAM notices SPRUCE's camera is still rolling.
SAM
Seriously - you're still shooting?
DEAN
It makes him feel better. Don't ask.
The camera starts to static again.
SPRUCE
Ah, hell, guys getting your ghost-roll thing, something's coming. Oh, my -
SPRUCE is thrown to the ground when DAGGETT appears and SAM shoots DAGGETT with rock salt.
INT. EAGLE'S NEST - NIGHT
HARRY, ED and MAGGIE are in the circle of salt, MAGGIE has the camera.
HARRY
I know how we can get through to him.
ED
How?
HARRY
Ed... He had feelings for you.
ED
Huh?
HARRY
He wanted you.
ED
Wa- wanted me to what?
HARRY
You know...
HARRY makes a thrusting motion with his hands to indicate CORBETT's romantic feelings for ED.
HARRY
And you know what you've got to do. You can do it, Ed.
ED looks unsure and shakes his head in objection.
HARRY
You've always been the brave one. Yes, you can. You make us brave- Maggie, right?
MAGGIE
Yeah, yeah, you do. You totally do.
HARRY
Ed...you got to go be gay for that poor, dead intern. You got to send him into the light.
ED takes a second to muster up courage and leaves circle and approaches CORBETT's death echo again.
ED
Corbett.
MAGGIE goes to follow ED with the camera starting to step out of the protective salt circle, and HARRY reaches to stop her.
HARRY
Maggie, no, no.
MAGGIE
No, it's okay, it's okay, don't worry.
MAGGIE steps out of the circle and follows ED, still shooting.
ED
Corbett, look. Hey, it's just Ed, buddy, it's just me. Hey, hey, Corbett, listen to me, listen to me. I - we...okay, you meant...Corbett, you meant a lot to the team. You meant... you meant a lot to me, you know, never ... never back down... never say a bad word, okay? I remember that, Corbett. I-I remember that, I remember that, I remember that because I love you, Corbett. I really, truly love you.
CORBETT pauses in his shaking and dying
ED
Do you remember that? Do you?
CORBETT
Hey, Ed?
ED
Yeah, yeah, Corbett, it's...Corbett, yeah, it's me, it's me, look at me. You got to help us, man, you have to help us, Corbett. Please, please, please help us right now.
INT. BASEMENT - NIGHT
SAM is making sure SPRUCE is okay.
SAM
Take it easy. You all right?
SPRUCE sees DAGGETT behind them.
SPRUCE
Uh, guys...
DEAN and SAM turn around and DAGGETT throws DEAN into a corner. SAM tries to get DAGGETT's attention.
SAM
Hey! Hey! Come here!
There is a beep indicating SAM cursed at DAGGETT and DAGGETT throws SAM into another corner and approaches SPRUCE.
SPRUCE
This is bad - very bad.
CORBETT's ghost appears and DAGGETT turns to face it]
SPRUCE
Corbett?
CORBETT rushes DAGGETT and wraps his arms around DAGGET, they both disappear in a flash of light.
DEAN and SAM move to get up. SPRUCE turns the camera on DEAN
SPRUCE
You all right, dude?
SPRUCE turns the camera on SAM next.
SPRUCE
You all right? Oh, my god.
DEAN and SAM both put their hands up to block the camera's feed.
EXT. MORTON HOUSE - DAY
The camera is on the IMPALA, and then goes to the trees and the front of the house that looks rundown, but not as ominous as it did at night with the blue tinted shots. Everyone is coming out of the house together, and the next lines by HARRY and ED are spoken in a voiceover of the last scenes of them leaving the house.
ED V.O
Leap year, February 29th, the Morton house. A tragic day, a day of souls bound in torment, of lives held in cruel balance. But the Ghostfacers, they did the best that they could.
HARRY and MAGGIE are the last ones out, and they pause on the porch and hug as DEAN, SAM and ED make their way down the stairs.
HARRY V.O (cont'd)
We lost a beloved friend, but we gained new allies.
SAM hands ED a piece of paper, most likely with their phone number on it and walks toward the IMPALA with DEAN.
ED V.O
We know this much that every day, including today, is a new beginning.
INT. ROOM - NIGHT
HARRY and ED are sitting in front of a fireplace in armchairs in a lavish room, just as the beginning of the show, talking directly into the camera.
ED
We learned more than we can say in the brutal feat of the Morton house.
HARRY
The Ghostfacers were forced to face something far more scary than ghosts. They were forced to face themselves.
ED
War changes man.
HARRY
And Maggie.
ED
War changes man... and one woman. You know, Corbett, we just...oh, gosh, we just like to think that you're out there watching over us.
HARRY
As far as we're concerned, you're not an intern anymore. You have more than earned full Ghostfacer status. Plus, it'd be cool to have a ghost on the team.
ED
Yeah, yeah. And here we were, thinking that, you know, we were teaching you, and all this time, you were teaching us...about heart, about dedication, and...and, about how gay love can pierce through the veil of death and save the day. Thank you, Alan J. Corbett.
HARRY
Go well into that starry night, young Turk, go well.
EXT. VAN - DAY
Camera is focused on CORBETT who is loading up the van.
CORBETT
Come on, Spruce. I got to get all this stuff packed up.
SPRUCE
So? Pack and talk.
CORBETT
I don't know what to say.
SPRUCE
Say what comes to mind. This is one of our confessional moments, Corbett, so confess. What do you think is gonna happen tonight? What do you think's gonna happen tonight on this trip?
CORBETT
I think tonight- I really do- I think all our dreams are gonna come true. Does that sound stupid?
SPRUCE
Kind of does, yeah.
The camera freezes on the face of CORBETT smiling, and fades to black.
SUBTITLE
In Memory of ALAN J Corbett, 1985 - 2008
King Of The Impossible
INT. GHOSTFACER HQ - DAY
SAM and DEAN sitting in front of a computer monitor watching the episode with the Ghostfacers watching over their shoulders.
ED
So, guys, what do you think? You all right?
DEAN
You know, I kind of think it was half awesome.
MAGGIE
Half awesome - that's full-on good, right?
SAM
Yeah.
SAM continues to talk, while DEAN puts his hand into their duffel bag and takes it out, covering the opening on it up.
SAM
I mean, its bizarre how y'all are able to- to honor Corbett's memory while grossly exploiting the manner of his death, well done.
DEAN
Yeah, that's a real tight rope you guys are walking.
SAM
Yeah, all right, guys.
SAM and DEAN get up from the chairs they are sitting in, and move toward the door.
ED
No, that's reality, man.
SAM and DEAN stop walking away, and turn to face ED.
ED
Yeah, Corbett gave his life searching for the truth, and it is our job over here to share it with the world.
SAM
Right, well, um, our experience, you know what you get when you show the world the truth?
DEAN
A straightjacket or a punch in the face, sometimes both.
SAM
Right.
HARRY
Oh, come on, guys, don't be 'facer haters because we happen to have gotten the footage of the century.
ED
Oh, yeah.
DEAN
You got us there.
SAM
Yeah.
DEAN
Yeah, well, we'll see you guys around.
SAM and DEAN leave, ED closes the door after them.
HARRY
Dicks.
ED
Oh, yeah.
MAGGIE
Totally.
HARRY
Yeah, yep.
SPRUCE
I'll start laying off some DVDs.
HARRY
Sounds like a good idea, Spruce. You know, guys, I think we're gonna need a bigger office here, you know, 'cause we're gonna go national, and then it's gonna go international, and then-
ED finds a duffel SAM and DEAN left behind and hauls it up onto the desk in front of the laptop.
ED
Hey, Menudo left their dance bag behind.
ED and opens it up and starts to dig through it.
ED
What's inside, huh?
ED pulls out a strange looking contraption out of the bag.
ED
Whoa, what the hell is this?
Static starts appearing on the monitors where SPRUCE is working and on the laptops in front of them..
SPRUCE
Uh, I seem to be having some technical difficulty over here.
HARRY
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait! "No operating system found"? Wait a minute.
EXT. OUTSIDE IMPALA - DAY
SAM and DEAN are walking toward the IMPALA.
SAM
We clean?
The Ghostfacers yell 'Nooooooo!' from inside HQ.
GHOSTFACERS
No, this can't be happening, are you kidding me?! No!
SAM and DEAN get into the car.
DEAN
Electromagnet wiped out every tape and hard drive they have.
SAM
World just isn't ready for the Ghostfacers.
DEAN
That's too bad, I kind of liked the show.
SAM
It had its moments.
The Ghostfacer Theme plays as they drive off, there is a voiceover, when the credits start.
ED
That is money in the bank.